Sunday, March 2, 2014

Happy Hour

Pharrell’s single from the Despicable Me 2 soundtrack, Happy was accompanied by the world’s first 24 hour video (Visit 24 Hours of Happy for the full interactive experience).

The various hours feature some seemingly regular Joes and some obviously professional dancers singing, dancing, and of course clapping along. And then there are the real stars: the innocent bystanders- more confused than happy, but a few do clap along.

The song will hopefully take home an Oscar this evening despite some stiff competition from U2 and also from Disney (the Academy loves Disney) but we’re keeping our fingers crossed around here.

Until then, let’s note some of the more blissful hours in the day

10 AM
The Cat on the Hat guy gets a little scary after a minute but he makes this the most bizarre hour of the set. Well, him and the kid whose mom gave him too much Robitussin to keep him calm until it was his turn.

Now I tend to be more entertained by the “regular” people than the professional dancer types but the guy on the end of this one is pretty amazing.

3 AM
One of the happiest hours of them all, this one will definitely make your cheeks hurt from smiling. And not just because apparently if you go to see a children’s movie in the middle of the night, minions will dance around you. Awesome.

Plus, didn’t you just know that the guy around the 20 minute mark was getting ready to do something impressive?

12 PM
One of the few hours where almost everyone almost breaks into (Mickey’s) Monkey which is what every person over 60 inevitably does if you play this song for them. And because suited people expressing unbridled happiness are great entertainment. And because we’re all secretly waiting for the skateboarder to roll right out into traffic.

1 PM
Pharrell in one of the last places you’d expect to see him, a really cute guy around the 28 minute mark, three of the Odd Future kids in one of the funnier versions in the whole day, and more of the oddest bystanders of any hour.

3 PM
If for no other reason, the very first segment with the live choir. If that didn’t move your spirit and make you happy, probably nothing will. Plus there's this guy

Be sure to check out the other hours for more fun and celebrity cameos.

Bonus Clip: Hatty (not to be confused with the lady at your church with the largest hat and tissue covered mints)

-just a note-

While anyone who knows me knows that I am a HUGE Pharrell fan, I’m still a human being who is also female and half way intelligent and I have my limits.

I have ignored his dishonesty up until now. That whole thing about the Blurred Lines video being directed by a woman and being about empowerment- -  I never pretended to buy it but I never said anything either. It’s not that critical in the big picture.

Plus, I already know the truth which would have sounded something more like, “I like titties. And I’ve got enough clout to put them naked in a video and pretend it’s art. Now kiss my ass.”
That would have been so cool.  That really would have been For real Pharrell

But I guess you can’t say those kinds of things and still be considered a good humble dude, so he stuck with his horrible explanation.
Okay fine.

But if no one corrects you then, you keep going, and the thread just keeps right on pulling and everything unravels.

And on his “I love women (wink, wink)” world tour comes this little statement.

Silver-lined doors, you say?
I wonder what he calls a c-section scar?

Now somewhere in the back of my mind I’m trying to see this as a reverence for women who carry and give birth to a child. I think that’s where he’s going, I’m wanting to believe that’s where he’s going but it’s not coming out like that. (not to mention ignoring great mothers who never gave birth to their own children)

Instead of sounding like, “thank you for your role in the circle of life” it comes across more like “I love it and it’s on my mind so much it’s diminishing by ability to eloquently express myself and I might need to seek treatment for it.”

Someone stop him before it gets really dumb.

While we’re at it, let’s  officially kill the whole  “women have the pussy so women have the power” thinking.

We are so powerful that we have to get naked and/or rub ourselves down in public in order to show our joy but Pharrell can be happy and fully- clothed all day long. That’s a problem. That my friend, is the true  “unbalance”  you might want to speak on.

I should also say there’s nothing wrong with feeling good about yourself, ladies, but we have to stop tying up our pride in our vanity- both sins incidentally if you’re religious at all.  But our attention span for someone being  shot in the head in the name of education and equal rights is not as long as it sometimes is for any random whore that posts a nude pic of herself online. Some of you are running to be seen by people who are looking in the wrong direction in the first place.

Stop showing yourself this way. It doesn't make you special. Turning someone's head doesn't make you special because frankly, some people will turn their head for anything.  Bing “random naked whore” and you’ll be lucky if your picture shows up in the first million results. Doing these things makes you that common.

There is more to you than that.

Don’t let a half way cute guy with a little extra talent and mouth that apparently moves faster than his brain tell you otherwise. You rule for a lot of other reasons that have nothing to do with your body or any of the openings on it.

G I R L is in stores 3/3/14. Sounds like a lot of demos but very, very awesome demos.

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